You’re covered in spit up, baby is screaming, neither of you have showered in days? weeks? years? The two year old needs milk and baby needs a diaper and you two, need a date night!
Romance after kids can seem like an impossible task, just one more thing to add to the list. We dream of candlelit dinners, weekends away, and some of the fun that got us into parenthood in the first place, but when you have kids at home ( whether newborns or teens) making time for each other is hard. We are overworked, touched out, and tired. But there are answers! Unfortunately none of them are easy for everyone, but getting creative, using the resources you have, and having some fun with the ups and downs, can help get that spark going!
Get Creative with Location A pizza on the living room floor can make for a fun date night picnic. Grab pillows, blankets, and cuddle up together for a good movie. Once the kids are in bed and asleep a home date night can be a lot of fun! Try making the pizzas together and go a little gourmet if you want! A picnic in the backyard, a late night drive for ice cream while the baby sleeps in the back seat, or a new video game for 2 are all fun ways to spend time together!
Set a Date Even if you have to set it a year out, setting a date and keeping it is an awesome way to make sure you are getting the chance to get out. It can be so nice to dress up and go out every once in a while. So get the tickets, make the reservations, and find the sitter. Sometimes a night out can help you find that piece that has been missing since baby came.
Find the RIGHT Babysitter One of the biggest barriers to date nights that we hear is that finding a good babysitter is almost impossible. So we wanted to list a few resources. If family or close friends aren’t an option take some time to make a few calls or send a few emails out. Call your local birth and postpartum doulas, while they probably don’t offer childcare they most likely know someone who does. Call or email your local high school, many have child development classes and the teacher may have a few students who would be a perfect fit. Or call your local childcare centers, they will know someone! Take the time to interview a few people, and make sure you discuss price!
And remember, romance isn’t always about big gestures, date nights, and fancy gifts. Sometimes its having someone else there to help clean up the throw up or change the sheets.
Personally I am both the easiest to please and the hardest. I want either Little Caesar’s $5 pizza and watching the sun go down, or a full weekend away in a private cabin with no neighbors. So whatever makes it work for you! One of our favorite dates was a walk in the local park (and getting chased by a screaming squirrel!).